Man NEVER Needed a Book To Learn How To Be Man!

I can’t believe we are in a time of lack of masculinity, men never needed books to learn to be a man, it was learned through toughness.

I grew up with my dad missing all my teenage years because it was easier to drink and avoid his responsibility for 3 kids.

Growing up on welfare was an embarrassment!

I became a man at 12 years old when I started working it help out, to buy my own clothes, help with my brother and sister. I didn’t have a brand name pair of sneakers until I bought my first pair of converse at about 15 years old!

My buddies also were raised without a father, but somehow we figured it out through sports in school and out of school, chasing girls, and working for the stuff we wanted.

We weren’t entitled because we had no fathers or money, we never asked our mothers for money, we earned money or did without!

I didn’t grow up in a hugging home, it was a physically and mentally brutal upbringing, and everything was my fault, violence was a way of life in my house, weakness was NOT excepted!

At 17 years old had my first kid, how does a 17 year old with no high school diploma, raise a kid, support a wife, and pay for an apartment?

WENT to work!

And when my daughter was two I become a single parent!

At 21 had a second kid from a different girl, times were getting tougher.

You talk about depression and anxiety, try being responsible for two children, with no plan.

I drove 21 miles to work, paid bridge toll in the worst cars, no a.c. or heat to make $6.75 an hour part time, in hoping I would get full time at the top pay of $11.75 an hour.

I eventually earned full time, taught myself to drive a tractor trailer and at 24 years old bought my first home, then a few years later two more kids came, now with four kids, a home I found managing money, a home, kids etc was a huge struggle.

My wife was a stay at home mom!

Working 7 days a week for years was tough, but my responsibility was now to my children, no one was their to bail me out of bad situations, life sucks when you need to roll change to buy baby formula, and diapers cant pay the mortgage figure it out, electric gets turned off; you figure out how to get it back on, car breaks down you figure out how to get to work, no quitting, you have that count on you.

No going out to eat, taking my lunch to work, no entertainment, but managed to give my kids all they needed and more!

I didn’t buy my first good car until I was 38 years old and bought it for my wife!

Since I have been 18, I have NEVER spent one day unemployed, laid off or ever collected unemployment.

I never quit, I fucking pushed on, I didn’t whine, I took responsibility for my life every step of the way!

This is what men do, they stand in there and fight until the fucking end, giving their kids better than they had, being a role model!

Now with my kids grown, and with 6 grandkids I can look at what the struggle was for!

Now we are doing well enough that we can help our kids, because we struggled and didn’t give up!

Not bad for a guy with no high school diploma, and a wife with a GED

“You can never take the character of a man that pulled himself out of a life of struggle!”

When you grow up needing toughness, you build toughness, you get more hardened, more callused and have less tolerance for weakness!

So stop making excuses, and own your situation!

Johnny Grube




  1. BrooklynChuck says

    Thanks for sharing this with us John. You are indeed the clear example of what a real man is and does. I’ve seen others use others and Rob from others to make it through instead of paying their own way. Nothing is truly yours until you earned it ON YOUR OWN WITH NO HELP! I’ve seen people rob their own parents of money just because they couldn’t have their own way. Pure laziness. I would struggle til I’m blue in the face to say something is my own, no one gave it to me, loaned it to me etc..

    Great Post John

  2. Nice post. I can’t help but laugh thinking of all the cry babies on Youtube who beg for money so they can make videos and avoid work.

  3. Andrew stone says

    Exactly how a man should be.
    I started working for money when I was eleven.
    Never wanted anyone to give me anything.

  4. Andrew stone says

    I consider that I was very lucky.
    My dad was a very good role model.
    He rarely worked only five days.
    Normally worked six or seven days a week.
    Encouraged me and my brother’s to work from an early age and take part in boxing and rugby.

  5. Andrew, always good to have a role model, I had to find my role models later in life.

  6. Chuck you’re the man!

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